What (or is there) an appropriate way to ask guests for monetary wedding gifts?

I am not getting married anytime soon; but If I was, I wouldn't want any of the traditional gifts that guests often give (towels, kitchen electronics, crystal, etc.) Although those things are nice, a donation into an account or towards a down payment on a house would be much more useful and smart. How do you word this on an invitation or is it extremely rude to even be choosey over your gift?

What (or is there) an appropriate way to ask guests for monetary wedding gifts?
It is tacky and rude to instruct your guests how they should ply you with gifts or money. Sadly, tackiness and rudeness are becoming very commonplace at weddings, at the pre-wedding things, the bridal showers, and so-on.





You wouldn't mention gifts or money on a wedding invitation. To do so would be like setting an ultimatum. What gifts or money guests decide on giving should be entirely up to them.





The only acceptable time you could mention money or gifts on a wedding invitation would be in a line that read something like this:





Please, no gifts or money. We only want to share our happiness with you.
Reply:This is still incorrect. No "line" even mentioning gifts is permissable.





Have a beautiful wedding and a more beautiful marriage. : ) Report It

Reply:It's rude to put it in the invitation, but a way to get what you want is to register at the stores in your area for the things you really need and like. But for cash gifts, the best way to get the word out is to tell the mom of the bride and groom. Most weddings I've been to, those attending contacted the parents to ask what the bride or groom would like. And most people are more than happy to just give cash and skip trying to figure out what to buy.
Reply:I'm sorry to have to tell you, but there is not only no way to direct the sort of gifts you'd like, but no way to request a gift, at all.





A gift is not an entrance fee to the wedding/reception, after all, it's an expression of the giver's best wishes.





You get what you get. Buy your own house, like everyone else.
Reply:I think, and I know I have Miss Manners backing on this, it's extremely rude to expect presents at all.





Is that why you are inviting people to the wedding??? I'm guessing probably not... so, you shouldn't expect anything... just be gracious about what you are given... and thank GOD there is ebay, because then you can just sell it. ;)





Don't even get me started on gift registries.
Reply:I completely understand where you are coming from, but it's considered rude to ask for money on an invitation -- it's dictating to people what kind of gift they should give you. If there's a possibility of registering for it, you should do that. And also tell your family you'd appreciate money so that if people ask them what to give you, they can say.
Reply:It is quite rude to suggest that guests give you ANY gift -- much less to specify cash.
Reply:It's NEVER correct to even mention gifts on your invitation or anywhere in your wedding invitation 'packet'. Cash gifts CANNOT be asked for, unless you don't mind being seen as rude and tacky. However, it is appropriate to use word of mouth to spread such a request. Have the family gossip spread word.





Dont forget, you can also register places like Target and Home Depot - if you are getting a house, this is a great way to get all the things you need for it. Even if you returned all the gifts you got, you can have the "cash" put onto a gift card and use it as you need it.





Remember, weddings are not fundraisers.
Reply:90% of your gifs are going to be cash anyway, especially if you don't register! So, there's your answer, Don't register for gifts.
Reply:I don't think there's any polite way to request cash/check only for a wedding gift.
Reply:Some cultures have the guests dance with bride and groom and give them cash while dancing. Like stick the bills to them.


Think lap dance while fully dressed, but on the dance floor. ;-)
Reply:I have attended a wedding where the invitation says





"Thank you for your thoughtfulness but in lieu of material gifts, we shall appreciate it further if you can give us monetary gifts to help us start our new life together."





I think that is more convenient for the guests anyway, since they don't need to bother shopping etc.